onfidence is the feeling of having faith or belief in someone or something, and in this case ‘self’ confidence is the belief or faith within yourself. Now it might sound trivial to some but confidence is a quintessential ingredient especially when striving towards success, this can be from a personal, business or relationship standpoint. Great athletes, prominent leaders, distinguished role models, a successful marriage or a good relationship all require confidence as a prerequisite, now below are five simple steps you can take to building your ‘Self-Confidence’.
Stay away from negativity, Surround yourself with positivity
- Evaluate your inner circle, including friends & family. Eliminate any & everyone who puts you down or shreds your confidence. Confidence comes from a belief that you are worthwhile, valuable & you need a positive attitude towards oneself, any individual that jeopardises this is a hindrance to you becoming confident, cut them off immediately. Negativity is pessimism incarnate, it is a defeated mentality, positivity is confidence personified, a winning mentality regardless of circumstance.
Affirm Yourself
- You’ve probably heard this phrase before PMA [Positive Mental Attitude]. Affirming yourself means empowering yourself constantly through positive thinking, believing you will succeed in anything. The trick is to change that inner-monologue you have with yourself, affirmations are one of the quickest ways to gain inner-confidence. We tend to believe what we tell ourselves, better yet say it out loud, and phrase it like a question. “Why am I so good at my job?” rather than “I am so good at my job” our brains naturally seek answers to question whether the question is valid or not is of no consequence.
Visualise
- Almost everyone I know has heard or read about a book called ‘The Secret’ by Rhonda Byrne. Now it may sound esoteric, mystical & inexplicable but you must visualise the end of the process, before & during a task or endeavour. World class athletes do this, a sprinter will visualise themselves winning the race & sure enough it gives them the confidence to compete with the ‘intent’ of winning. So, if you have something you want to achieve you must visualise yourself achieving it, if you want to be confident then see yourself being confident, it gives your subconscious mind ‘references’. Try to also accompany these images of success or confidence with positive feelings, the subconscious mind is stimulated by images & feelings. The subconscious mind can process 40 million bits of data per second whilst the conscious mind can only process 40 bits per second, so visualisation is a wonderful way to hardwire yourself to become self-confident.
Accept Failure
- Failure or better yet ‘fear of failure’ is one of the key antagonists to self-confidence. Fear of failure can be a paralysis to one’s self esteem, confident people seem to have this innate ability to be ‘fearless’ or ‘forthright’ in situations other people shy away from. However, it is not that they are not fearful, they simply de-sensitise themselves to fear, they feel fear but they do it anyway. Not one person on this planet can lay claim to having conquered fear [it is an evolutionary necessity], accepting failure and becoming de-sensitised is the answer, embrace failure but learn from it then correct your mistakes and move on. You can challenge yourself by taking the 100-day rejection challenge [putting yourself into situations of rejection so you get de-sensitised to failure/rejection]. Funnily enough some of the greatest accomplishments in human history are a direct consequence of failures that in time became successes, do not succumb to the ‘fear of failure’ embrace it as part of the process.
Positive Body Image
- This is an equally contentious but crucial point, the way you appear in your environment affects how that environment interacts with you. And if your environment interacts with you positively you operate confidently, one way to affect how your environment in this case people interact with you is by making a positive impression, and dressing well or appropriately has a direct effect on how people treat or interact with you. No two ways about it, the cover of a book does matter, eliminate the shallowness for a second. If people treat you with a certain level of respect, what do you think will happen to your level of confidence? Also, working out, indulging in fitness or physical activity increases self-confidence. Firstly, it decreases tension, improves physiological & psychological functions. Not to mention fitness has been proven to decrease depression (the antithesis to self-confidence), heart/bones grow stronger plus you release beta endorphins (feel good chemicals in your brain). A positive self-body image is a good confidence booster, and one of the ways to get there is through exercise & fitness.
Til next time
